Happiness is one of those things that happens when the pieces begin falling into place. Imagine the world as a giant puzzle and each person a smaller collection of pieces that create one focal point of a bigger picture. Happiness is when those pieces finally come together and everything becomes more clear; it all starts to make sense.
You might start out with a general idea of “the way things are supposed to be”. This is your plan, but you’ll quickly discover that executing a plan is never as easy as you might first imagine it to be. You can match like colors and differentiate between all of life’s obstacles. This takes time and effort. There will be a lot of confusion and chaos, typically followed by frustrations and sometimes anger. Sometimes you will forget that this is normal and that everyone experiences similar situations and problems on their journey. Just remember that every piece, no matter how upsetting, difficult, or irritating, is essential to complete the whole. It’s a lot of trial and error. Then, one day you’ll wake up and something will just click. You made it through the screaming, tear-filled, restless nights. You don’t have to argue and fight this uphill battle today. You realized something important along the way. You remembered the bigger picture, the end goal, the thing you’ve been working so hard for. A piece fell into place.
So take a break, sit back, and celebrate this victory. Enjoy the little things so you’ll find the strength to endure another day. Cherish what you have presently. Don’t let the frustrations of yesterday weigh on you anymore and don’t let the fears of tomorrow push you to giving up. Let’s focus on our happiness to keep it alive as long as we can because one day we will find two pieces that don’t fit and it will be discouraging, but memory will remind us that while some things don’t work out, others do. We will find happiness again.
When the earth turns
and the sun peeks the horizon,
The midden reeks
while the vultures flock,
Widows and children mourn
upon the survivors return to pick up the pieces,
It is then and there
that the war finally sees an end
Written By: Hollie Barringer, 2015
Stare grimly into the faces of the despondent
Wondering what words they’d speak,
Should their voices erupt in chorus.
Chains shackle them to the undertow,
Juggernaut strength wrestling with their souls.
Tumultuous cries and unparalleled ferocity,
Raking soft flesh like claws of the beast.
As strength wanes and the tide breaks,
Their skulls wash upon the beaches of eternity
Where we will build anew.
Written By: Hollie Barringer, 2015
Today she questioned the motives of another.
They replied with: “I’m living and learning”.
She pondered the statement and then, with a precious smile asked: “Are you living to learn, or learning to live”
I find that the implications of deciding which is more true is of great significance not only to the individual, but to all who may cross their path as well.
It took me awhile, but I’ve finally figured it out. I now know from whence those taunting whispers come. You ridicule my indecision and shove me toward a cornered space. You are that black light illuminating my every stain.
I watched the trades, burning soul for soul until the carapace crumbles to dust. I memorized the pattern, swirling anathema into the depths of ruin. I felt everything, suffocation beneath the weight of an invisible force.
It took me awhile, but I finally figured it out. My hell is you, and I want no more.
Written By: Hollie Barringer, 2015
A little something about me, for those that are interested… Some of you may have gathered that I love mystery- in books, movies, and also in life- and I wanted to share one phenomenon in this world that really captivates me. Simply put, I love abandoned zones.
I have had a few people question me when I express my interest for abandoned zones, and maybe it is a little odd, but I tend see beauty in things that are otherwise less than perfect. There is something intriguing about the unknown, and when you look upon a ruin- a place long since abandoned- there is an unspoken story that tantalizes me, a lingering presence I wish to know more about. What makes those places incredible to me is a combination of awe for nature’s ability to [adapt] shape itself in and around human obstruction as well as the immeasurable amount of wonder I feel looking upon a fragment of history- no matter its significance- left to decay. For some reason or another, there is cause to move on and leave the past behind, but why would we abandon that which we’ve invested so much time, effort and currency? The possibilities are endless. Perhaps resources ran dry or natural disaster forced the population to seek refuge elsewhere and after a long period the new establishment proved to be more valuable. It is possible that conflict was the driving force behind the abandonment of an old city; our worlds history of war and genocide across the centuries has detached families from each other, and whole populations from their roots.
Knowing why a place was abandoned is not always completely satisfying. My mind stirs with questions about the individuals who once resided there; every life has something to share, an experience unique to themselves, and I am bewitched by the prospect of what we could learn from that. The complexity of this existence is beyond me, but I am content with the knowledge that there will always be something more to contemplate, explore and grow from.
Maybe it is the writer in me, so utterly fascinated by stories unspoken for, or perhaps it’s simply that I am able connect to abandoned zones in a spiritual/metaphorical sense. In the way that we [humans] abandon places and things- leaving those echoes of the past to be swallowed by time- there are junctures when we also abandon pieces of ourselves and those remnants, despite having been lost or forgotten, become something beautiful behind closed doors. The doors we close may or may not ever be opened to us again, but whether its an individual returning to a closed door or another individual opening it for the first time, what was there before is not the same as it once was, because time, experience, and perspective are always re-shaping the boundaries of our scope.
It is a time to reflect for many, a day to recall memories and make promises for the future.
I tend to notice that the promises made today are forgotten tomorrow, and many are so vague or hollow that they seem to lack meaning. I find it preferable to make promises I can keep, promises that will make a difference in my life.
So this year, instead of making vague promises to “make this year better” or meaningless ones that I know I will never keep up with, I want to work on my attitude because it is something I am accountable for. I want to be slow to anger, get rid of the notion of judgement, speak with kindness and learn respect in all facets of the meaning. I want to experience the world in a way I never have, and to cherish my blessings because I know I will be happier for it.
I hope everyone has a wonderful evening tonight in celebration of the new year. Stay safe and keep off the roads if you are going to drink. Remember to let your family and friends know how much you love them more often than once or twice a year because you never know how long you will have to do so. Work on bettering your life with small and manageable steps. Don’t worry about disappointment because it is always bound to occur, just take it in stride and move forward.
I wish you all the best, enjoy the last night of 2013 and God Bless!